(Photo by Natalie Baugh)
How-To: Avoiding Wedding Guest No No’s
By Zelda Dominguez
Millennials make up to 80 percent of marrying couples today. Although they are changing a lot about weddings and creating new traditions, there are still some things that remain wedding no-nos.
Here is my list:
1. No Leaving Your Cell Phones On During the Ceremony
Don’t make the mistake I did and remember when your cell is ringing in the middle of, I do! I know you probably want to take pictures, so don’t embarrass yourself; make a reminder to turn it on silent.
2. No Forgetting to RSVP
Even if you are BFF’s or family members and think they should know you are coming, be courteous and reply. They have gone through great lengths in planning the guest list and including you in their budget for this wedding. So if your invite says 1, don’t bother the bride and groom to ask if you can bring someone.
3. No Bringing Any Uninvited Guests
Like mentioned above, it’s an honor to be invited and included in their budget. Average cost of a wedding is 33,391 per 2017 The Knot Wedding Study. Average per person today is $71.00 to $100.00. So, be considerate and don’t bring a plus 1 if not allotted on the invite. It’s really not cool, especially for your guest when there is no seat for them. I’ll even add this; don’t bring uninvited kids. Not all weddings are kid-friendly, so honor the couple’s request and definitely don’t get an attitude and take it personally.
4. No Sitting in The Front Row
The front row at the ceremony is usually reserved for family or the wedding party. Also don’t assume at the reception a reserved table is reserved for you. Ask if there is a seating arrangement and if not, where can you sit. Just because you don’t like or know who you are sitting by isn’t a good enough reason to move to another table. It’s important to remember it’s not about you––it’s the wedding couple’s day. Don’t cause a scene or confusion––you were seated there for a reason. They obviously trust you can handle it.
5. No Starting the Reception Until the Couple Arrives
They may be playing your favorite jam and you got to bust your moves, but it better not be before the couple dances their first dance. Also, just because the food is being set out, doesn’t mean you can go start serving your plate. No eating till the couple’s arrival. Some weddings will offer hor’dourves with a cocktail hour, but unless they are offering, don’t take it upon your self to serve your own. In some cases, no alcohol is served. Whether its due to the venue not permitting or their personal choice, please respect their wishes and don’t be tacky and BYOB.
6. No unrequested Toasts or Announcements
I’ve been to weddings where either best friends, or family, have gotten up, grabbed the mic, and either made a fool of themselves or horrified the guests with old stories of the bride or groom and their dark past. Or the infamous roast speech and, crossing the line to a whole other level! Unless you are asked to say a speech prior to the wedding, zip your lip.
7. No Complaining to The Bridal Couple
This is not your wedding. Things are going to go wrong, but the couple doesn’t need to know personally from you. If something happens, be part of the solution. Ask someone in charge if they need help and if so step in and offer to lend a hand.
Maybe you’re not feeling the DJ, the food isn’t to your liking, or they ran out, but don’t bother the bride or groom with your opinions. If you didn’t respond to which meal selection you needed on your invite, that’s on you. Some people are upset that they don’t have any options for their dietary restrictions. I’m sure if you let them know on your rsvp, then they can be accommodating.
8. No Disregard of the Dress Code
The invitation today will usually state what kind of attire to wear. I’m attending a wedding this weekend where the invite read, “please dress semi formal/ bright colors.” They advise you for a reason. You will look pretty funny if you’re the only one at a formal wedding in jeans and Converse.
9. No Social Media Posting
It is not cool to post pictures of the wedding or especially of the bride before they say to. I was at a wedding in March where they announced not to post any pictures until they posted their first pictures. Please restrain yourself. The bride wants the revealing of her dress to be a surprise. So if you happen to catch a glimpse DO NOT post them. Average budget for professional photos are $2,500 to $10,000. NO PHOTO BOMBING, no matter how funny you’d think it be.
10. No Taking Center Pieces or Décor Without Asking
You should not assume they are up for grabs. Lots of times they are rented and will be charged for every missing item. Wait until they announce you can have them.