(Photos by Maylin Rowe)
Learning How to Cope With Insecurity
By Sarah Komisky
I was looking through an old journal one day. I was probably in the 6th grade. Inside my lined paper notebook was a hand-drawn picture of how I saw myself at the time. All over my face were little ink dots and my bottom was ridiculously large. Looking at it several years later, it looked kinda silly. You would think I had chicken pox or I was half-camel.
From my point of view, I saw acne all over. In reality, I only had a few little red dots here and there — it wasn’t the end of the world! As a tween, your going through the “P” word: puberty. There are a lot of changes that happen. Skin goes wacky sometimes and we get acne. We can feel a lot of different emotions and can grow in many different ways. This is where we experience body changes, and mine definitely was. That day, as I was venting into my journal, I was super insecure about my bottom. Somehow I thought it was too big. In reality, my 11-year-old body was just changing as I was developing a more curvy figure. This is what happens as your body gets ready to be a teen.
While a part of me laughed when I saw this picture, another part of me felt sad. I wish I didn’t see myself that way. A lot of my insecurities of how I thought I looked weren’t based on how I really looked. Sometimes these insecurities got the best of me and they caused me to worry and be self-focused. They also even caused my mood to change, making me sad at times of insecurity. Oh man, how I wish I could go back and not waste my time staying in a place of worry and sadness!
So girls, this is what I can tell you now. As you grow up, your body changes too. You might have acne, you might get really tall or maybe some new curves might show up. Either way, just because your body looks different from what it used to, you are not ugly or weird. And just because your body might not look like one of the girls from Fifth Harmony, someone who sings on the radio or your big sis, it doesn’t matter. You be you. Give your body some time. It’s going to change because you change as you grow. And guess what? You aren’t the only one who feels funny. Everyone has times where we feel insecure, even the mean girls.
But you know what? You don’t have to stay there. When you feel insecure, it’s totally okay to vent. Tell God how you feel, write it down and give your feelings to Him. Ask Him to help you see yourself as He sees you. You are enough and beautiful in His eyes. Then take time to talk to someone you trust about your insecurities. Grab mom or a mentor and share with them how you feel. Share with them your questions about the changes you are going through and I encourage you to ask them about a time they felt insecure, and how they dealt with it. Then, take a look together at what God says about beauty and pray together.
When I had those days, I would go to my mom who gave me a hug, answered my questions and reminded me of how God saw me. It always made me feel better. And hey, maybe you can throw some ice cream in along the way.
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